Happiness Abound

He's all smiles when he is awake...Dylan is a joyful baby and I believe at the rate he is blossoming, he will be as joyful as Kaitlyn, but with a calmer and more cautious presence. I've been blessed with this one as he sleeps well, eats well, poops well, and even looks well! At two months he holds his head up with great strength, he loves to stand up and will lie in bed counting the specs in the air until he either falls asleep or gets a touch restless. If the latter the grunts start up and his bodily sounds fill the room-nothing outrageous, but enough to wake you from a deep sleep. He's chill...

This photo was taken by a friend of mine from a moms group I'm a part of and I must say I am fooling the camera tremendously. I actually look fit and trim (well, that's arguable, I know) when in reality I still weigh the hefty 190 mark and have an overstretched belly that gives me an award winning muffin top! All in due time as right now I've got smiles to enjoy and cooing sounds to entertain!

Pee Pee in the Potty

It was quite the moment. After Kaitlyn's bath she hung out in the bathroom in her birthday suit while I bathed Dylan. She occupied herself with books and bath toys all the while talking and talking. I took Dylan to Kaitlyn's room (the next door over) and as I was dressing him I got this feeling that I should check on her. When I did, I found her sitting on her potty-a usual siting these days not to pee but to sit and read (yes, I do realize she will be one who grows up to use the restroom for not only the call of duty but also to read and seek respite). I went back to tend to Dylan when shortly after I heard a sound. That type of sound that makes you rush. When I got to the bathroom door she was shaking her potty upside down and on the floor was a puddle from what she spilled out. My girl went pee-pee...pee-pee in her potty!

We did a pee-pee dance, swapped a few high fives and said 'Awesome' a number of times! Folks this maybe a one hit wonder...or a start of a new chapter! I suppose potty training should officially start tomorrow!!!

Post Bathtime Charm

Life has never been so busy. Two children under the age of two should sum it up. Actually, for those of you who are not yet a parent, and quite frankly, for those of you who have one child...it may be hard to relate. Allow me to explain:

Alarm clocks are overrated when you have a six week old who wakes you up every two to three hours to nurse. It just so happens when he finishes his last feeding of a night series, daylight has filtered into the room and as un-welcomed as an alarm, I get a jarring 'Mommy' from Kaitlyn's room. The day has officially began. Can I pee before I get her? What about getting dressed? If I don't do it now then I won't see my closet until mid-day. Oh well, 'Mommy' is even louder this time around and so off I go to get my little sunshine.

While I like to think mornings have become my favorite time of day with my children, it is truly the hardest part. Fortunately, despite any lack of sleep, within thirty minutes of Kaitlyn's 'Mommy', I'm fairly awake and consumed with comforting, cooking, feeding, talking, explaining, ... diaper changing, dressing, cleaning, playing, disciplining... the list truly goes on. Let's not forget the baby-he usually gets up and mind you he is upstairs while Kaitlyn and I are downstairs. If our staircase could talk it would request a massage. HTA (High Traffic Area) for me and the kids. Up and Down. Up and Down. One would think I could plan my day better to avoid the Up and Down, but the fact of the matter is that with two children, you can only plan so much. 16 steps. I know each one intimately.

Did I mention that Steve is sleeping during all this? Add that to the mix and it adds a slight level of strain as I try to keep everyone quiet-it doesn't work. Kaitlyn is ready for voice lessons as she warms up in the morning. You can find her often screaming a song or two. I haven't figured out the lyrics yet, but her range is quite elaborate. She also likes to whine and cry in the morning if the baby is awake with her. It's a jealous thing, but it's no quiet songbird. She is a broken record some mornings. I'm exhausted just writing this out.

Breathe.

By lunch I have reclaimed energy as I know quiet time/nap time is just around the corner for Kaitlyn and that means I will hopefully have some personal time-all dependent upon Dylan's decision to head for a nap, too. At a minimum, it will be one child to care for over two. Naptime comes and goes for me. On a rare occassion I slip into bed for a power slumber (with the exception of today...a blissful two hour nap beckoned me and I indulged) but generally naptime if both children are down means time for me to catch up on emails, surf the net for Christmas gifts, work on the MOMS Club newsletter and design birth announcements, baptism invites, holiday cards...do something creative. Then it's over, all too soon.

Second part of the day arrives and it's busy...but easier than the morning. It's pretty much focused on dinner, preparing it, eating it, cleaning it up. Then onward up the stairs for bathtime, storytime, clean-up and bed-time. Bathtime has come to be a cherished time for me as I place Dylan on a blanket and as he counts the bathroom lights Kaitlyn gets all washed up. Both are typically in their best form. It's lovely. It's not hectic. It's totally manageable.

Post bathtime, however, is another story. Kaitlyn is my bulldozer and that is her MO when she gets out of the bath. Naked butt and all she runs wild in her room. First taking her books off the shelves, tossing each one into the air like they don't matter anymore. Then it's a race to hide from me to avoid putting on a diaper and lotion. Sometimes a good bite occurs as I try to grab her and that just puts her into a timeout which results in the horrific screaming cry since she feels it's the end of the world. After a good timeout she's an angel child, obediently gets dressed and reads her books like nothing ever happened. Dylan hangs out through it all, patiently awaiting his next nursing session.

Once Kaitlyn is down then it's at least an hour holding Dylan before he is down for a good few hours. This is when I should crash. BUT, I don't. I embrace this time of the night as the only time for me. Well, it's not really for me until I finish up the dishes, tidy up the family room and keep some laundry going. When that is over, if I'm still standing, then I find some respite in my office before hitting the sack to only be awakened moments later by Dylan's grunts letting me know the cycle of night feedings, once again, has just begun.

Super Nanny Please

Photo taken at the Hodgkinson's home-Kaitlyn was dancing to the music while wearing these 3D glasses that were for viewing their Christmas tree! It was a sight to see...little miss spunky!

Where is Jo from Super Nanny? Can she come for a private session? Today Kaitlyn has bit me more times than I can count on one hand. She has tested my limits that I'm at the mercy of any advice. What I'm praying for now is a R E A L serious face. I believe she senses my nerves and strong desire to crack up when I'm scolding her. Knowing too well that if I crack a smile she will take a mile and unfortunately my emotions are worn upon my sleeve. I haven't cracked yet, but I've made a semi-smile frown and forced tears to compensate for my overwhelming desire to burst into a manic laugh! I think you would, too, if you were facing her mischievous temperament that is ever so present behind those big brown eyes.

Time out is catching on, but I'm beginning to think she likes the idea of time out, so much so, that she doesn't think twice about:

-climbing up onto the coffee table...

-dangling one leg over the side of the couch while staring right at you with her tongue peeping out the side of her mouth...ignoring my 'Kaitlyn, sit on your bottom please'...

-opening the techno cabinet (place where all our digital devices live) and ignoring any 'Kaitlyn close it shut, please'...

-biting my leg, pinching my arm, hitting my face....one thing to the next in that order.

Will this end? It's a total game and I'm totally losing.

Wolftank

He is hairy. Hairy from head-to bottom-to toe, hence 'Wolf', and his 'Tank' is never full! Wolftank has a torso that exceeds a typical three month onesie allowance and hands that could grip a grapefruit. This child is big. He arrived big and has only grown bigger. What's to come? Will he be like his distant cousin and sport 18 month clothing by eight months? How about this hairy situation...I look forward to the hair loss to see if he does lose the trail that travels up the spine of his back and the extra coat wrapped around his ears. Shed, baby, shed! No matter, he is the world's most adorable boy. His grunts are being replaced with cooing sounds and his luxury stay in the family heirloom bassinet may come to a sudden end as conditions are projecting a crammed holiday season if he continues to sprout at such a rapid rate.

One week to the next his facial expressions change as well as his strength. Just today I noticed how long his eyelashes have become. Ladies, don't even think about it! Dylan is going to be a priest...really, his romantic future will be as heart pounding, anxiety driven for me as Kaitlyn's future will be with the guys. My palms are sweating now just thinking about it!

Almost Three Weeks

He's big. He's expressive. He's got EYES that compete with Kaitlyn's! His temperament is cool, calm and curious-unless he's tired, that's when he cries and gets all stiff. When he's hungry, watch out if you are holding him, he's been known to suck cheeks, blankets, shoulders and comes pretty close to sucking your hair or ear...best thing to do is pass him my way as he doesn't like a pacifier nor a finger. He wants the boob. Blue, Yellow, Green and heck, even pink look great on him. Most of his blankets are hand-me downs from Kaitlyn so the pink is generally found in his swaddle!

Some other interesting facts about Dylan:

-He grunts and sometimes lets out a note or two when sleeping. Another musical child in the works, I think.

-He poops after every nursing session-clockwork!

-Dylan loves to be in the arms of anyone (assuming his tank is full and his diaper is clear).

-His eyes go cross-eyed OFTEN, it's pretty funny especially when he puckers his lips together and makes an 'ooooooo' sound.

-He has this magic time in the middle of the night that he likes to call 'DAY' resulting in a 2.5 hour play-date with mommy generally starting around 2:30am. Yes, this is tough.

-If you are lucky to witness an occasional smile, you will be lucky if you don't melt away. He's a total hunk when his dimples are showing...

Reflections on Gray

I stare into the mirror and realize it's not the mirror, it's me. I'm aging. Fast.

When you are pregnant so much talk is generated around the question, 'do I get my hair colored or wait until after the pregnancy?' I caved in after the first trimester and did my typical, safe, no-drama, all over hair coloring and felt like a million dollars. Now that I'm post-partum and have been fantasizing for months about my makeover in body, fashion and hair I realize the hair makeover needs to happen now! If I were to chop all my hair off and go pixie, like I did for years back in college, I'd be more salt than pepper. I'm only 32....sad to say, it's genetic. Should the makeover be drastic and be natural? Ha! That may make me feel like I owe someone a million bucks!

I'll cope with the gray by covering it up with some copper and chocolate! I need to feel like a million bucks these days as lately I've been having numerous moments of feeling like a parental FAILURE! It's no post-partum depression folks, it's called being a mother of more than one child and dealing with the adjustment. It's tough, it's rough, it's exhausting, it's tasking, it's emotionally draining....and all the while, some miraculous force provides you with energy that gets you to tackle the escalating situations, one after another.

I'm praying more, I'll tell you that. Praying for strength to hold my cool, praying for diligence so I don't become a push over or overlook what needs to be seen, praying for joy so I can relish in the small moments rather than fester over the big ones...praying for my husband, praying for my support crew...praying for my children. Praying that I stop getting more gray hairs and that my tummy will continually shrink-but at an exponentially faster rate!

All in all, I wouldn't trade the stretch marks and saggy belly, my current fashion size of 14 plus, the gray hairs, or even the chalk on the walls, the blow-out diapers or barf on my shirt for ANYTHING ELSE. Two children (two babies, really) change your heart then change your reality...but thank God they change your heart first-your heart gives you the strength to manage the every-hour-on-the-hour breastfeeding sessions...your heart gives you the strength to put both feet on the floor each day...your heart gives you the strength to deal with spousal tension...your heart gives you the strength to have patience first, then compassion, followed with action.

I suppose since I can't blame my mirror for my reality of aging, my heart gives me grace to accept the things I cannot change.